hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
