great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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