STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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