Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
