You're completely useless in the revolution.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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