that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
