she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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