Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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