What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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