Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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