And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
