He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
