I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize