I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I look better un-naked...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
