She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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