Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize