I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
