cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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