A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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