Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize
