Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
