so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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