My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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