Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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