this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
