I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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