Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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