so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize