i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
