watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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