can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
