I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
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