Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
