she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
