Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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