i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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