New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
