I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
