i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
