Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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