nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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