why didn't you poke me back
so that wasnt chicken after all
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
