Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
