It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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