Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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