This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
