its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
