I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
