I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
