Whoa Z and x make the same sound
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
